Falling in Love with My Husband

I woke up this morning with a smile on my face and an empty pillow next to me. My husband has been gone for 2 weeks on business yet he is still in my dreams.

I had dreams of our first date. The restaurant we went to, what I ordered, how I had a few beers and never actually ate anything. His smile, and the nerves I felt when talking to him. When he walked me to the car how I couldn't wait to kiss him and stuck my foot in my mouth and asked him to kiss me, so I could stop being so nervous. I had had a crush on him for a few months at that time and felt like it took forever to go on a date with him.

It makes me smile to think after we left the restaurant he followed me to a park by my house. We sat on a picnic table talking and making out. I was 24 at the time. I don't know how much time we were there but we got busted by the cops for being in the park after dark. What a way to end the best night so far in my life.

I remember so much about how nervous I was, how much I liked him, how cute his eyes, lips and smile were. He made me feel like I never had before. The day I met him, he gave me this smirk, something he later admitting not even knowing he was doing, but the smirk melted my heart.

Everyday I see his face in pictures, or hear his voice it all comes back. I miss him so much when he is gone and I only hope I feel like this forever. I fell in love with him and my heart new he was the one before my mind knew it.

When I woke up this morning my mind was on his face and I my heart was filled with those memories of our first date. Then I thought about how if I would have known I would be married to him, and having our second child together how much more excited I would have been that day that started my heart a flutter. I don't think I could have been anymore nervous, so I am glad I didn't know. But I am also glad I waited for the man of "my dreams".

I love you Andrew, you have my heart and I am so glad to be having your children. You are a great husband, dad, man and person! Your family misses you and can't wait until you come home.

They say absence makes the heart grow fonder, even being in another country I still like he is by my side at night because my heart is filled with his love.

It was a great way to wake up this morning, and can't wait to go to sleep tonight to see him in my dreams. Then by the end of the week he will be in my arms again.

20 weeks Pregnant and it's a girl!

So am still not use to the idea of having a girl. I thought I would have two boys. Well I like the idea of one of each. I hope Barbies, pink madness and lacy things are limited in my future. I never got into those things, so I am sure she will and I will have to have my sister come play with her! No really, I will be able to play with her if that is what she really likes, but I hope I can expose her to other things in life.

I find myself pointing out trucks, and tractors and airplanes to Hudson all day long, well now he pointed them out to me. This morning was all about the garbage truck, which we followed down the street to the end of the block and around the cul de sac because he kept signing "more". Then on our way back home a cement truck pulled up and started pouring cement with 4 workers loading it in their wheel borrows. Fun stuff for an 18 month old, I had to bribe him to come back inside so mommy could get out of her robe and shower before noon. The bribe was to brush his teeth and get dressed to go to music class with grandma. He loves music class! So it worked.

Anyway I hope I am as excited about the same things with my daughter. I want to point out trucks, planes and animals to her, and if she likes them as much as Hudson does great!

I know there is an innate part of humans that automatically classify childrens genders with certain interest. I do not want to be so far to the other side about this, but I also want to make sure I am treating her the same as Hudson, no matter the little task at hand. I want her to have a choice on what she likes, expose her to many things, but not point her into a box of "girl" stuff. She will find out more than enough from her friends when she is older. I don't need to buy a barbie to make her feel girlie.

On the other hand, Hudson shows such signs of being a "boy" it is uncanny. He will run around and jump, and climb and freak out so he can get rid of his pent up energy. I have never seen a girl do that. But maybe I haven't raised one yet, so we will see.

It is so funny how we are born with certain likes, attitudes, aggressions, and energy that your gender really can be a deciding factor on how you go through life. But not all are created this way, and some have more or less than one without the gender being the "typical" for the attribute.

So with that, I go to bed. Dreaming of what it will be like to raise a daughter. I hope not much different with my lead, but only hers. I will be there to guide her safely through the paths she chooses, no matter which way. Just like my son.

PS. Teenage life will be different I know, and I hope my husband and his respectfulness, loving ways, and wise wisdom beyond his years influences both our children so they make good choices in life. I hope we all like, love & respect each other through those time.

For now, I look forward to the newborns smells, toddlerhood and the first day of school.

Product Recommendation for Expectant or New Parents

I have several products that I have used as a new mom and found to be essential in my daily life in parenting. I would like to pass on my information of the great products out there, that are available to expectant and new parents.

First I would like to start with baby products. Here are a few essentials to have ready before baby arrives:

Moby Wrap Baby Carrier







Lanolin Nipple Cream

for breastfeeding moms





All Bravado Nursing Apparel: I have used and highly recommend this nursing apparel. I sell these so if you want one you can order from Bravado directly or if you are local to Sacramento, California I can do a bra fitting and consultation for you for free!

Nursing Bra's - Bravado







The Orginal Nursing Bra- Also by Bravado. This one is great for sleeping in.







Nursing Tanks








Belly Band












Breast Pumps and accessories: Medela is a great basic pump and available everywhere. The best one I have found is the Pump in Style












You can also purchase accessories and rent them locally in Roseville at: Herself Moms. As well as the Birth Center in Sacramento, & soon Mothers' Support Network will be renting alternative cheaper rentals for the local nursing mothers in the area. Check them out!

Alternative devices for breast pump parts locally in Sacramento is: Freemie

Here are a few books that are the best out there. They range from All in 1 from pregnancy to new baby. Most are great tools for helping you write your birth plan. As well as for researching comfort measures and looking into your options for support, goals, childbirth education and doula support.

Pregnancy, Childbirth & the Newborn







Thinking Womens Guide to a Better Birth







Your Best Birth













The Complete Idiots Guide to Natural Childbirth








Support
The Doula Book







The Birth Partner







Breastfeeding
The Ultimate Guide to Breastfeeding







The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding







Childbirth Education & Options-
Gentle Birth Choices







Birthing From Within







Ina May's Guide to Childbirth







Movies
Business of Being Born







Orgasmic Birth (this is a really good birth movie, you just need to get past the title, it has great information after about the first 10 min. You won't be disappointed!)















Signing Time (DVD series of Baby signing) - My son stared watching these at 1 yr old. I checked a few out from the library to see if he would like them. He loves them! I bought the baby set of 4 and he is now 18 months old and knows of 50 signs! I love that we can communicate before he is able to talk with words. He knows hows to tell me almost everything he needs, so there is no guessing, and very little screaming or fits. The best choice I ever made!










You can also visit my doula website for great video clips from YouTube about doula's, pregnancy and other birth related issues.
Better Birth Doula Services

Resources

In the Sacramento, California Area:
Bump, Birth & Beyond
Better Birth Sacramento
The Only Baby Stop

Nationally:
My Best Birth
American Pregnancy Association

I hope all my findings, and uses help expectant and parents get a good source of information, products and tools to help them in the process of becoming a new parent. Please pass on this to blog to anyone you may know who is pregnant.

I also would love to hear of any other sites you may have come across as well that helped you in your process.

May parenting be the best thing that ever happened to you!